Thursday, April 26, 2007

Slow Dance

I read Marley’s blog a few days ago, and I felt that I should reply to what she said. I might not be able to answer there, and the sheer lack of a Multiply account makes me oblige to share my thoughts on my account.:P Plus, this would reinforce my past post about not letting go of my blog – not just yet anyway.

I guess after the discussion our Singles group held last Friday, all of us have been thinking about the question of purity and GB (God’s Best), even if it’s in different levels. I’d like to share my thoughts here about it, although I’m not sure if what I’m going to be saying in my blog is more or less than what I’ve mentioned that night. In all honesty, I can’t really remember all I’ve said last night (I believe that it was really the Spirit’s leading that gave me those words).

A brief background on the term “GB”: this is something my friends and I’ve picked up in college, and also what we believe in with our hearts (quite literally, but pardon the pun). In general, GB is God’s perfect plan for you. It’s really what the Lord has in store for you if you choose to follow what He wants for you, and please focus your attention on the latter part of the sentence. He can only give you the chance to have the best that life can offer IF you choose to follow Him with everything that you are. It’s not because He is powerless or stingy with His blessings, it’s just that, how can He work in your life if you continue to push Him away and don’t allow Him in? However, if we choose to subject and surrender everything to Him, that’s when He’ll be more than delighted to lead us where He wants us to be, and that’s the very best of what we can have. This includes our careers, families, friends, etc. More often than not however (and more importantly to some people), the term “GB” is translated as that person that God wants to bless us with, to possibly spend our lives with together with him/her. There are other terms to call it: soul mate, one true love, whatever. It’s really a romantic notion, but I think that each one of us nurses in our hearts that desire to find and keep that special someone.

For me, I believe in waiting. Maybe right now, God has already brought my GB in my life. I can’t say for sure, but I believe in trusting Him about this, that in His perfect time, He will reveal that someone. It’s quite funny, because a lot of people think that “waiting on the Lord” is really lame because it seems like those who’ve made that commitment are scared of having to work it out by themselves. I’d like to disagree with that, because trusting in God, especially where this is concerned, is really a courageous act, because we go against our instincts. We don’t jump on what our emotions (and hormones) are telling us, but instead attentively listen to what the Lord has to say. If we’re going ahead of ourselves or, quite simply, completely wrong about what we think we’re sure of, He’ll rein us in and say, “Slow down! You’re going too fast!” Honestly, it’s really quite easy to act on our nature and say, “Hey, this is where I want to be, and no one can stop me.” Waiting is a totally different experience, and it teaches us a lot of patience and maturity among other things, not the least of which is love.

Yes, love. I can hear the collective gasps of people. “Oh my gosh! She’s mentioned that four letter word! As if what she’s saying isn’t mushy enough!” Har har. The world’s corrupted love so much that people just don’t understand what it means anymore. It becomes locked inside this little bright red box that opens once a year on February 14, and it brings along with it sappy music, lovesick people, and barfing sounds from people who would probably rather eat dirt than to admit that they’re affected by all the sentimental jazz. What is love, though? One thing that learned in a classroom in college which is actually applicable in life is that love extends from more a feeling to a choice. I hear (or read) kids as young as eight years old say that they’re in love because whenever they see this person, their hearts beat faster, they become all giggly and giddy, and they feel as if all the butterflies from the park have suddenly teleported into their stomachs. Older people might say because they feel electrified when that person touches them. Still others say they know they’re in love because if their “significant other” leaves them, they will not know what to do with their lives. This is the perception of the world now. This is what love has gone down to, because people forgot who was raised up as an act of love. Jesus was literally lifted up when He was crucified, and His passion is the greatest love story that will ever come into existence. People say that that title belongs to Romeo and Juliet, but that’s fiction. Jesus’ love is truth, the biggest and barest truth that we can ever be faced with. What else can you call it, that someone could have given His life so completely and unashamedly for people who’ve constantly spurned Him? It’s not idiocy, because He knew full well what He was doing. It was and is the purest form of love that anyone could ever hope for, and no one can even begin to compare to that (so don’t be deceived if someone says that his love for you is so great that he’s willing to get the moon and the stars for you).

How does this translate to our human form of love? As His love for us is pure, so should our love be pure among each other, and most especially to that special person in our lives. I really and praise God for all the things He’s been teaching me now. I’ve come to realize that the more I feel the need to be with someone, the more I should lift it up to Him. It’s not because it’s a feel-good thing I’m doing for myself, that I’m being all sacrificial and noble and all that, but it’s because it’s something that I know He wants to take a part of in my life, as with all the other things I’m involved with. I won’t kid with you, it’s hard. I’m not emotionless. I do get hurt, impatient, and angry, and that’s why I have to bring it before Him all the more. If I acted upon it, what would happen? Not only am I getting out of God’s perfect will, I’m also setting up that other person to potentially fall? If you truly cared about someone, would you want them to fall into sin just because of you? No, right? Definitely not. We would want what is God’s best for them too, right? We want them to be at the center of God’s love and plan too, and doing all we can to attract them will definitely not help them in the least. Even if it might seem like the right thing, and maybe you are thinking the right way when you believe that that is the person that God would want you to spend your entire life with, but even if you got that right, if you went ahead of God’s timing, then it would still be wrong. The Lord might have been planning to work on the both of you, making you better, more mature people before He brings you together, but because you jumped ahead of time, your immature relationship might end in a break-up, even when you could’ve ended up together.

What can we do to keep us from going ahead of God’s plan. We pray that He guards our hearts. Emotions aren’t bad. These come from God and nothing evil or cruel can ever come from Him. However, if this is the only thing we will rely on, then we’re setting ourselves up for heartbreak. Emotions are temporal and can change with our moods. Would we really want to bank our hearts, a huge part of ourselves on to, metaphorically speaking, a wobbly cart that might topple at the slightest things? No. Instead, we place it on to something that’s permanent, a strong foundation that will not collapse no matter what happens. We lift it up to Him. Asking God to guard our hearts is different from asking Him to take away our emotions. It’s not so much “Lord, make me stop feeling,” but more of a “God, I know my heart is fragile and vulnerable. I want it to be kept pure and whole, and that’s why I ask you to protect it.” He will not keep us from feeling, because it’s something very human and also a blessing from Him. What He will do is to keep us from unnecessary hurts, by sheltering us from people and situations that can be painful for us. This doesn’t mean that after we ask the Lord to guard our hearts, we can go out and flirt with those from the opposite gender. Not only are we defeating the purpose of our prayer, but also we’re leaving ourselves open to attacks from the enemy, and he won’t be so merciful with our hearts. We also have to do our part in guarding it, and that means protecting ourselves from situations where we might end up falling. It’s hard, I know, but after all the waiting, the pain, and all that, it’s really going to be worth it in the end. I mean, it’s God’s perfect will for the both of you. Where can you go wrong?

So how long does the Lord want you to wait? I honestly don’t know the answer to that, but I’mquite confident in saying that when that time comes, He will give you a clear “Go” signal to go on with it. I know that with me, God still has a lot to work on. I’m not perfect, and I will never be as long as I am in this world. I know there are so many things in me that have to be removed, purified, trimmed, pruned, what have you. I still have a lot to learn. I mean, come on, I can’t even be described as domesticated as of yet. At the same time, however, I continue to hope and pray for that time to come. I know that if it’s God’s will for me to get married, He would bring that person in my life in that way when the right time comes. Even now, He might even also be teaching that person to be the best man that he could be. I know that he is not perfect (only God is), but I also know that he’s going to be the best for me. (Of course, there’s always a possibility that the Lord would want me to live a life of single blessedness. Sounds surprising, but who knows what God’s plans are? His ways are not ours.) Whatever happens, it’s going to be according to His will, and it’s going to be pure and beautiful because it’s something that He’s constantly telling me to lift up to Him, and that He is the very center of this.

In closing, I’d like to leave you this poem I’ve written, my (very short) translation of the book Song of Songs. The title of this entry and the poem are similar because the image popped in my head earlier. In terms of our “love lives,” if we lift it up to Him, it becomes like a slow dance with Him and him (or her). It’s magical, it’s beautiful, and it’s going to be worth every minute of it. Hope you like it.:) God bless y’all.


Slow Dance

We go out into the night
Holding hands with arms stretched towards each other
Reveling in the pureness and beauty of it all

You take me in your arms
Hold me close to your heart and
Making me feel safe and secure in your embrace

We hold on to each other
And off we go
Swirling and twirling and turning around and around

We need no music to be played
Because we create our own
Melding together, our hearts create the beat

We fill the room with laughter
For no one else can make us feel such sheer joy and
Defining the very pinnacle of our existence

I look in your eyes
And I see there the promise of the beauty, the wonder, the perfection of
Living a new life with the old completely erased

I see in them your love
That knows no bounds, and I am left
Wondering why it’s me that you’ve chosen, with all my brokenness

You continue to hold me
And a gentle look, a touch, a smile is all I will be
Needing to be assured that your heart is given to me as I’ve given you mine

And we continue to dance.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Long Time, No Post

Hey everyone (at least, for those who read my blog. I still have no idea who a lot of you are - if you're still around). I just want to apologize for the long period of my silence. I'm not going to abandon this; on the contrary, I'm trying to figure out a way to modify it to make it a bit better-looking (learning HTML and all that makes me a bit more courageous in tinkering with this). Right now, I changed the template I'm using (as you might have noticed). The only downside to my modification is that everything I've included on my blog in the past have disappeared, including my links, so I'll have to build all that again. However, I'm hoping that this is just going to be temporary, as I'm planning a completely different look (not just a face lift, but an entire body overhaul) for this, so I do hope you stay tuned for that.:)

Anyway, just to give a very short explanation why I haven't been posting, it's because I've been maintaining 20+ other blogs for work. I'd really rather not dwell on this (not unless I want a million fangirls spamming or screaming), but let's just say it's part of my job. When all that is over, I might migrate a select few (and when I say few, I mean few) of my entries from some of these "work blogs," but we'll see. No guarantees yet, just depends on how I feel by then.:P

Thanks all, and God bless.:)