Name-Calling

"What's in a name? That which we call a rose by any other name would smell as sweet."
- Romeo and Juliet (Act II, Sc. II)

Zy-Za and I were brainstorming (well, more like braindrizzling) in a coffee shop on what the title of her blog will be a few months ago. Since we were feeling particularly loony that day (trust me, drinking coffee when you’re already hyper is totally not a good idea), the stuff that came out were titles that bands would probably sue us for practically mangling their names. Some notable ones were Switchsock, Sonicpatak, Bangang Putik, Baby Katina, and other such mutilations that are practically lawsuits in the making. She eventually didn’t take one of those titles, though, as you can see.:D

It took some time to percolate in my head to come up with an entry with at least a bit of sense, but that instance got me thinking on the value of names. From time immemorial, names were given to objects, the name-giver exerting authority over what has been named. God giving Adam the authority to name the animals in the Garden of Eden (Gen 2:19-20) shows that He allowed man to be the caretaker and overseer of His creations. Nowadays, some inventions or discoveries are named after the creator or founder, probably to preserve the memory in a more lasting way. Names were given to label an object as something. The scientific names of cats (felis domestica) and dogs (canis familiaris), for example, are dead giveaways. In the past, monickers were also given to warriors depending on their attributes, and end up being their title of sorts. Names are also given to denote belongingness to a certain organization, such as surnames that let other people know that the person belongs to this or that clan/family, or membership to a group. Some names, on the other hand, seem like quirks of fate. A fish might not have been called a “fish” and instead a “book” if the circumstances made the person who coined the word think of the latter word. People who end up with unpleasant names (I’d rather not give examples of these, so as not to disrepect them) are victims of these. This doesn’t completely negate the Bard’s declaration, however, especially if the object belongs to the last category – names that are given almost by accident. A person may still remain the exact same being regardless of the name given to him/her – but then again, maybe not, we will never know. What I understood from the philosophy given by William Shakespeare is that the name in itself is not important – it is the core of the person/object that would matter. Some people go off and have their names changed for whatever reason they might present, but be it their old or new name, it would still be the same person at the end of the day.

Yet names are not worthless. Not at all. A person’s identity becomes so intertwined with his/her name that one virtually cannot be separated from the other. Once a person acquires a name, s/he has the responsibility to take care of it, unless s/he wants to bring dishonor to that name.

As Christians, we have a greater responsibility in protecting the name, not only for ourselves and for other people but for God as well. The word “Christian” itself gives a two-fold definition – one that is intrinsic, and another that is extrinsic. We are Christians in that we believe that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Saviour. Being a Christian also means that we have to be Christ-like, for we belong to Him. That’s why we have to be careful in our demeanor, whether or not other people may see us or not, because we are of Christ, and we should not bring Him dishonor. What right do we have to do that, when He gave everything for us? He did more than just die on the Cross for us – He gave us a second chance at life, life that He Himself gave in the first place, and which we abused and wasted heedlessly. He does not impose on all people to go and act in a restricted fashion – the freedom of choice that He gave us. Yet upon knowing what He has done for us, would we really still want to turn our backs from Him? That is why protecting the name of Christianity is important. We don’t just go and proclaim to the world what our belief lies in, but we also serve as witnesses for God. We have the responsibility not only to ourselves, but more importantly, to other Christians whose name might be tainted to some people because we, upon proclaiming that we belong to God, proceed to act as though we don’t.

Sure, it’s just so easy to keep it up there in your head, but the practice of that is much more difficult. We might go and pray, read the Bible, and attend Bible study or other such similar activities, but outside of that, we go off and act as though we don’t know God at all. Sure, we have the tendency to think highly of ourselves (the pride talking) because we do those things compared to those who don’t, but that’s just self-righteousness. A friend once told us a story of a guy who is the son of a pastor. He tells people who know him that he’s a Christian, yet his actions show otherwise: He does substances, parties all day and all night, and does just about everything to please the flesh. One day, one of his friends approached him and asked him if he was a Christian, to which he replied proudly that he is. The other guy looks at him and then says, “So Christians aren’t different from other people, after all.” The guy was so shocked at that that he immediately repented. Once we accept Him in our life, it means that we offer our whole lives as a pleasing sacrifice for Him, and that means to live for His glory and honor. If we go and proclaim that we are and yet do what is contrary to this, we also affect other people, especially those who don’t know Him yet. They might think that it’s ok to those things since we, who are forward in shouting His name, do these anyway.

God wants not just a chunk of a person to worship Him – He wants the entire person, and that means that a person who genuinely desires to have a deeper relationship with Him has to surrender all facets of life to Him. He’s not only asking for our Church life or our family life – He wants everything. It’s not about being a perfect little angel in front of your parents and to those you have fellowship with, and then act completely different in front of other people because it seems that it’s what the situation requires. If that is the case, then you’re following not Jesus, but what the world is saying. It’s faux Christianity, because you’re doing it only to please some people and not really God. Yes, it cannot be denied that we fall – it’s human nature. We can never be perfect no matter how hard we try; there is only One who is perfect, and that is God. Does that mean, then, that however hard we try, we will never be able to please Him? No. This is where the first definition of our faith comes in, that we belong in His Kingdom (Rm 8:38), as long as we humbly offer ourselves to Him and acknowledge our sins. Reading the preceding chapter of this from Romans, the text talks about Christians who still commit sin (Rm 9:13-25). We know that certain actions are not pleasing in God’s eyes, and yet we still do these anyway. In effect, we do things that we hate. What can we do then? It is to rely in the power of God’s grace through Jesus, for He is the Way, the Truth, and the Life (Jn 14:6). We submit our lives to Him. It’s an honest and sincere move on our part to live for Him alone. That is what genuine repentance means: to not only feel sorry for our sins but to make an honest and genuine commitment to not do these again. We’re standing up for Jesus, and we must take care that we truly do live for Him. Our actions, our thoughts, everything that we are should be done for His glory and honor. Our whole lives should reflect who Jesus is. We should live for Jesus, period. We might go and do a “Christian deed” as it appears outside, but our motives are completely different. God knows that (Lk 12:2-3). We might do these to impress other people and not really for Him, but He is aware of that (Lk 16:15). In the end, it’s about truly living for His name and not a shadow or imitation of it. We proclaim our faith because we truly do live for Him.

Blessed is he who comes in the name of the Lord (Matthew 23:39).

Animal Instinct

Heehee! Someone emailed me these, and I couldn't help but post 'em. Aren't they adorable?:D (Heehee! I am such a sucker for animals!) I ordinarily would go for dogs more than cats (although I like felines too :D), but these are just too cute! (And I am babbling like a freaky animal lover, which I probably am, anyway.:p)

On Consumerism and Flip-Flops

I hate Havaianas.

Seriously.

Oh yeah, before I actually get into the meat of this entry, I just want to say that this is purely my opinion, and I am not endorsing for or against any product. I don't even know just how wide the readership of this blog is, so I can't really say just how many people will be affected by the stuff I put in here. Anyhow, that's the purpose of blogs anyway, right? For a person to put his/her thoughts into writing, and possibly for the consumption of other people?

Now that that's out of the way...

I really, seriously hate Havaianas. Whoever thought of importing them here in the Philippines should be sent to Brazil. Or maybe, made to wear Spartan or Rambbo rubber slippers for the rest of his miserable existence - let's see whether his toes will shrivel up and fall off just because it's not imported.

I guess my anger towards Havaianas is not so much against the product itself, but what it stands for, especially since it's brought here in the Philippines. Think about it. Almost two-thirds of the population in the country struggle daily just to bring food to their family's table, and the amount that they spend for their daily staple isn't even a quarter of what the price of a pair of flip-flops are. What used to be the poor man's footwear has now turned to be a status symbol.

Now, I would get it if people buy Havaianas because it's the only brand that provides the size needed (I know someone who does that, because other flip-flops companies do not make the slippers that size), or if the quality of the product is that excellent, but as it happens, it's not. It's practically the same quality of rubber that you can get for other flip-flops that cost about a sixteenth of the price of Havaianas. What you actually pay for is about two inches of embossed rubber, and that's that. You shell out hundreds, even a thousand pesos for that, money that could have fed a family for three days, I kid you not. For what? As a status symbol? So that people can say that you have the money to burn for a pair of rubber slippers? Why would you want to do that, especially here in the Philippines where even the size of your eyes is sufficient reason to be kidnapped for ransom? I'd say that you're courting trouble if you do that.

All this consumerism got me thinking: is this really what we prioritize nowadays? A friend once said that it's not so much as what you're wearing as who you're wearing, and the evidence of that is seeing people traipsing about the runway wearing the who's-who of the fashion industry. The funny thing is, a lot of times we go and choose these stuff just because of the name and not because we actually like it. It's the satisfaction of knowing you fit in with people who possess the same things as you do, or at least the silent gloating we do just because other people are green with envy because they can't have what we have. I recently saw this TV ad of a popular RTW store, and I was disappointed with what they were promoting. Although a part of the message was actually pretty good, the next wasn't. A line from the ad goes something like: "Looking good is not bad.In fact, it's what breed friendships." Oh, come on. What are you saying? That just because you can't look good means you can't have friends?

We put so much emphasis on material things that we forget who our focus should be: our Lord. You put so much weight on what other people will say about us that we forget that we are special as we are, the way He made us, and not because of what we may have. May we find fulfillment with Him.

The Serious Side

Now that I've posted something light, allow me now to go into something deeper, which is what God has been teaching me these past few months.

The middle of the semester, everytime I cut my Bible, I ended up getting verses of encouragement, telling me that God is always there for me, that I should turn to Him for strength and support, and such. Yet I fall over and over again, all the while asking why God promised me something and yet did not provide for that, especially when I really needed His help the most. Looking at it now, I realized that it was just the same, stupid pride which has led me to dangerous ground a lot of times in the past that made me fall again now. I took for granted that God brought me to law school because it was His Will for me, and although it wasn't conscious, my thoughts were primarily focused on that and on myself. It's like, I'm anointed by God unlike you people, so I can do anything I want and I will still remain successful. Ok, so it wasn't as bad as that, but my thoughts were definitely going in that direction. Reflecting on His Word brought me to repentance, because He made me realize that when He was telling me that He will take care of me and will provide for my needs, it's not so much as He bowing down to what I need, but on Him giving me what I actually need. I've become so focused on myself that I forgot that the reason why He brought me there was it's because of His Will. He definitely has a reason for bringing me there, and it's not to make me gloat about just how blessed I am. His Word told me that I should turn to Him because I need Him at that time, or because He will be the Source of my strength. Yes, He is saying that, but more than that is an instruction to continue to develop my relationship with Him and not limit my interactions with Him in the time of need. It's something that I've been trying to work on with myself for quite some time now, but it's only recently that I've finally realized what it means. It's not because He wants me in my situation right now for my sake, but He brought me there for His sake, to know more about Him, to reach out to those who are hurting and in need of His love. James writes, "Humble yourselves before the Lord and He will exalt you (4:10)." How can we boast of things when all of these are not from us but from Him? I shudder to think that I was feeling all puffed up when the source of my pride is not out of my own greatness or whatever, but out of His love. I was really convicted by what He told me, because all the while, I've thought only of myself and what He could do for me, disregarding what He wants me to do, and what I could do for Him, how He could use me as an instrument to bring others closer to Him. Yet this conviction was not the sort that made me want to go and crawl under a rock and shrivel up in shame. On the contrary, His Word made me lift my head again, because I know that the reason why He's disciplining me is solely because He loves me (Hebrews 12:6). That's the love of a good father - that he wants what's best for us and that is why he doesn't always consent to our ways (especially since they are crooked) - and God is the best Father of them all.

Another thing that has been convicting me is actually also an old struggle I've been having, and that is the surrender of my life in its entirety to my Lord. Yeah sure, I say that I am a Christian, but I have to say that I haven't been glorifying Him all the time. It's like I isolate and compartmentalize myself for the different aspects of my life - not so much that I become a completely different person depending on who I am with, but that a certain part of me becomes highlighted and some parts shunted, at least temporarily. It's still me, but it's an edited version. Yes, I still try to share Jesus to the people I meet, but sometimes, because of them and/or because of me, I desist. I am so convicted with this, because I know that the sole reason why they may be saved is if they might know and accept Jesus Christ in their lives as their Lord and Savior and to live solely for God, but I find myself having difficulty telling them the Good News, as if the words get lodged in my throat and refuse to come out. I still go and tell them about Him, I share some verses for encouragement, or I say "God bless" to them, but all of that is not what God deserves, because He definitely should be given more. I mean, it's so easy to go and tell fellow believers about Him and how He's been changing our lives, but when it comes to the very people who need to hear it, those who don't know Him, it's really, really difficult for us. It's condemning, and it hurts knowing that we can't give Him our all when He definitely went all the way for us.

One thing that strikes closer to home is something that I've experienced a little less than a week ago, and I'd like to go and use a teaching I once heard in Bible study as an introduction. The teacher cites Acts 1:8, which says, "You will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes upon you, and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, throughout Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth," which he explains that in applying this to the modern-day situation, Jerusalem can be taken as our family (where we're most comfortable with), Judea as our friends (within our vicinity), and Samaria as those who are veritable strangers to us. I've told some of the people from my Judea and Samaria on who Jesus is, yet I was convicted anew when I realized that Jerusalem wasn't something that I haven't reached yet. I guess a part of it is the fact that when i tried sharing to them before, I almost always get rebuffed, partly because they didn't believe that it was me who was speaking (which I admit is partly my fault), and partly because my beliefs opposed theirs. I ended up not speaking about it again, although I made them know just who and what I believe in, but a lot of times, I get the feedback that they treated my faith as some kind of a joke, or at least some "in" thing that I just got interested on but would eventually tire of (which is weird, because my track record wasn't like that). It wasn't until recently that I realized I have made an impact, and that was when my mom shared that the Word spoke to her, and she accepted Jesus. It was all I could do to shout, "Hallelujah! Hallelujah!" but I did run to my room to get my Bible and share some more with her. It was such a huge blessing, and it reminded me that I should reach out not only to those outside of my realm, but also and especially those who are close to me. It doesn't mean that just because they are within the vicinity that I could take them, or the relationship for granted. It should give me all the more reason to share to them.

I guess the main thing that I've learned from all of these is total surrender. Jesus commands in Mark 12:30 is to love the Lord with all our heart, soul, mind, and strength. Taking all of these into consideration, what have we got left for ourselves? Nothing. We give everything to Him as living sacrifices. He does not only ask for our soul or our hearts. He wants us in entirety. He wants our whole beings committed to Him, that whatever we may do, we live for Him. We are Christians precisely from the word itself: of Christ. We should strive to live our lives the way He did, and that is total surrender to what the Father is telling us. Sure, it may be an option to lift only a particle of our being to Him and that's it, but do we really want to do that? Do we really want to give only a speck of ourselves to the One who gave everything? I remember the last chapter of the Gospel of John, when Jesus was asking Peter just how much he loves Him (Jn 21:15-19). When I read it initially, I didn't quite understand why Jesus had to ask Peter three times for that, but one of our disciplers explained that in its original form, which was in Greek, Jesus' question put love as agape, divine love, unconditional love. Peter replies, "Yes, Lord, I love you," but the love he used was philias, love as friends, but nothing more. Can we really only offer him philias instead of agape?

Thrills and Spills

Lani the Klutz has officially resurrected again. After thinking that I'm finally free of my clumsiness, two consecutive days proved me wrong. On a Thursday three weeks ago, because of extreme exhaustion, I accidentally took the wrong jeep (as I take public transportation to and from school) and ended up in SM North, which is definitely not waaay of from where I live. But that's ok, even if I had to jump over one of those concrete road blocks in the middle of the road just to cross (Why did Lani cross the road? To find a way to go home.) I was too busy laughing at myself to realize that I (literally) tripped over my own two feet and almost ended up losing my front teeth in the process (Yes, tripping over one's feet can actually happen. I can testify to that). I guess my guardian angel was protecting me and didn't allow me to fall flat on my face, because I was able to catch myself before I completely fell (about 35 degrees from the floor), but I ended up scraping my left foot and wounding the right. That would have been perfectly fine had it not been for the catastrophe that happened the following day.

It was raining - not hard, maybe, but it was definitely more than a drizzle - as I got off the tricycle to go out of our subdivision. The trike made a U-Turn and went toward me, so not wanting to be transformed into roadkill, I sidestep, only to find myself slipping and falling (hard) on my left side, with the elbow and knee catching most of the impact. Thank the Lord I was wearing a jacket that morning so the damage wasn't that extensive, but it was wounded all the same. The knee was a bigger problem. Even if the wound there wasn't as big as the one on my elbow, it was really bruised. Up to now, it's still a bit painful if I kneel with it.
Still don't believe my klutziness? I remember high school based on the landmarks in my mind, which are my infamous thrills and spills (focusing on the latter). First year: Wanting to avoid a puddle of mud, I tried jumping over it, missed by a few inches, and ended up looking at the nice lovely cloudy sky after a few seconds - in front of the whole school. Second year: Mentos moment - I tripped, and the heel of my shoe comes off, and I think it's still there up to this day. Third year: I tripped, did a pirouette that would have made a ballerina proud, and landed gracefully - in front of a tricycle station filled with drivers and students. Fourth year: The heel of my shoe caught on one of the steps of the stairs (yep, you read that right: STAIRS), and I found myself zooming from the second step of the flight onwards. My only consolation was that there were hardly any people at that time, so I was able to save face - well, not really, because I ended up laughing hysterically at myself that people eventually found out about it.

Those are just the major ones. Minor ones are liberally sprinkled all throughout high school, like tripping and ending up having all of the stuff inside my bag flying. Although I still tripped, fell, slipped, and whatever-it-is-that-you-call-them, it wasn't as bad as before. Yes, I did have my moments, as the M-shaped scar on my right knuckle proves, or my back which hurt for almost a month when I ended up slipping (a friend swore I levitated for a few seconds before landing), as well as possibly a security camera in Galleria when I ended up tripping there after valiantly trying so hard to prevent it from happening, but nothing major came until what happened three weeks ago. Now those are part of the classics.

And yes, I did not forget that I referred to myself as clumsy and not just a klutz. My clumsiness oftentimes extends to the way I think (taking the wrong jeep is a sure sign of it), but also because for some reason, I have this talent of dropping things, or breaking them, the biggest of which is a copying machine of the company where I served as an intern. I thought that I was cured of these, but I'm still all thumbs and two left feet.

Do I have a point after saying all of these? Aside from making you scared of me (I can just imagine raised eyebrows and weird looks directed at the computer right now), what I can say is that I wouldn't trade my klutziness for the world. Sure, it gave me a lot of battle scars to prove my fight, but who cares? This is a part of who I am. This is a part of me that God gave for a reason - maybe to teach me to be more careful, or to show more trust in Him, or to laugh more at life. Whichever's the case, I am happy about it. Makes me more unique.;) Heehee! Seriously though, it's one of those things that differentiates me from other people - a proof of God's individual love for us, because it means He loves each of us specifically and in His own special way for each of us.

Fun, Fellowship, and Fishballs

Fellowship. It's such a serious word, isn't it? Thanks to pop culture, however, the word brings to mind hairy feet, long hair, and a high, rasping voice that goes, "My precioussss..." Whatever the word might imply or mean, I find that I actually am learning a lot of stuff from the fellowship I have been having recently (outside of the SS, that is).

First on the list is the pa-merienda event that CCF had for the Katipunan retreat (28 September 2005). Since Zy-Za and I won't be able to make it to the retreat, we decided to just go to the little get-together they arranged. We went with Atid, Jon, and Francis to UP to get the stuff we needed for the get-together. The girls were assigned to get chips, drinks, and ice, so we went to the UP Coop (a mini-grocery which actually has a lot of really good stuff) to get some of the food. We were already at the counter when Francis and Jon came back for us and asked our opinion on whether or not we should get cooked fishballs in UP, or if we just cook it ourselves. Zy and I agreed that it's definitely better if we prepared it ourselves - that way, it would be fresher (as far as fishballs go.) Jon suddenly goes to us and says, "Eto yon e, willing ba kayong mag-commit sa paggawa?" Hmmm... Something definitely smelled fishy, and it definitely wasn't the fishballs. Our suspicions were confirmed when Francis chuckled and said, "Read between the lines." Uh oh. We didn't really think about it that much, though, because we were too busy laughing at ourselves and each other's antics That was one of the moments that made breathing really hard because of too much laughter.("Sabihin mo sa mananahi, 'Ano ba? Cut me some slacks!'" and the sheer abuse of the expression, "Sitting on your laurels.")
After getting all the stuff we needed, we headed to the Student Center, where the event is to be held. Getting off the car, we saw Bens who was walking toward us with this really huge grin, and then saying, "Bumili kayo ng mantika?" Hello to you too, Bens.:D We unfortunately didn't, but thank the Lord there was a store nearby who has it. Anyhow, Zy and I were outside the building when Francis and Jon approached us, grinning broadly, and said "Handa na ba kayong magluto?" Eek. In all honesty, I can't cook by myself to save my life. The few times I've cooked, I've always had someone to direct me, but I've never done a solo act in my whole life. I am scared of fire and knives, as well as getting splattered with burning oil. Yes, I will rectify this and learn how to cook during the break, but I sure wasn't prepared that day! Zy, on the other hand, knows how to do it so she's game, so I volunteered as an assistant. That entire afternoon we spent in the kitchen, smelling more and more as though we bathed in several bottles of Eau de poisson, but it was absolutely fun. People dropped by from time to time to chat and/or steal fishballs.:p The guys visited the kitchen bringing their GB talks. The girls came in to exchange stories and to check up on us. Even those who we actually did not meet dropped by to say hi and to try to convince us to eat some food, which was really sweet of them. Sure, we didn't really mingle-mingle with the majority of the people as planned, but we still did spend the afternoon with them and we served for Him, which is more than I could ask for. It may be true that we belonged to different churches, but that didn't really matter. For all intents and purposes, we were a group of Christian friends who were there to spend fellowship with each other, and we did that, which was really great.

Another blessing in fellowship is our KG. I was at first apprehensive as to where I would actually be assigned to, especially since I was the last one among the three of us who was placed in a group (eventually we ended up together). It's amazing because we got to be part of the group that was just amazing. We know the majority of the members of the group, so that was great, especially since our personalities actually clicked. We could talk about serious and, urm, not-so-serious stuff at the same time, which is something I really like. I get to have fun with them, but most importantly, I get to know more about His Word through the sharings and teachings from them. Thank God for that.:)

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Anyhow, this will be my last entry for the night (or dawn, whatever). I can't believe just how much I missed writing, and I kinda overdid it this time.:P Stream-of-consciousness all the way! Heehee!